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| Cancergiggles is an idiot's guide to accepting, living with, laughing at and dying from cancer. The very, very last bit I can't be absolutely sure of, but then who the hell can? I could have written some beautifully crafted, grammatically correct essays but I hope you will understand, that when I say "I don't have a lot of time" I mean it far more literally than you do. I just wanted scribble a few thoughts to maybe light a spark in people - and then it became a book about Cancer, Life, Death, Illness and Politics. ISBN 0955198801 |
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copyright © 2004 Cass Brown
copyright © 2004
Cass Brown
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A HEAD
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posted Friday, 3 December 2004
A HEAD
If you have a head you will understand what I mean. I feel fairly confident in assuming that each morning when you wake up, you give little thought to the fact that you have a head attached to the top end of your neck and in all likelihood you pay little attention to its presence throughout the rest of the day. This state of affairs continues for days, weeks or even months, until that is, someone happens to strike you on the nut with a baseball bat. Inexplicably you develop an overwhelming preoccupation with your cranial appendage and for a short time at least, it becomes the most important item in your life.
If you have a long term illness or have been promoted to the top end of St Peter’s to do list, it can, if you have the right attitude, be very similar. My computer has just reminded me that I am due to see the Head Cancer Wizard in six days time, for one our update sessions. Apart from regular blood tests at my local surgery and collecting prescriptions, I will have had little medical contact for the best part of two months so I have reverted to being a normal person. Pains, pills and strange feelings are dealt with by “the other me” so day after day, as this me, I just forget things like sickness and death, in the same way that you ignore your head (apologies at this stage to all migraine sufferers). There is, in principle, no reason why you could not be permanently fixated with your head – it would just seem to rather a waste of time; dwelling on illness, from my perspective, is not just pointless, it is positively counter productive. I have met many people who thrive on being unhappy, love their own misfortune and adore conflict but as they are very stupid to waste the finite resource of their life in this way, my approach is the exact opposite. Being able to laugh and enjoy pretty well everything is fundamental to the way I live, so I literally don’t have time to consider downsides. The more important consideration however, is for those around you, because there can be few things, more unpleasant than living with a miserable shit.
The circle of life is such, that just one person being wretched acts like a virus; spreading amongst others until eventually returning to the instigator in an exponentially more virulent form. Whilst humour, smiles and pleasantness are an effective remedy, it is far more sensible to vaccinate against the initial outbreak by being as laid back as possible.
With or without illness, there is a common misconception that people are entitled to have “moods”. If someone behaves in such a fashion that others can observe that they are “in a mood”, they should be treated as you would any petulant, ignorant infant and ignored or ostracized until they learn how to behave in the company of grown ups (is it now illegal to smack children?). I’m not for a moment advocating a ban on sadness or any other non destructive emotion – I simply repudiate the premise that they are an excuse for uncivil behaviour. Whilst my brain cells are operational, I am fairly sure that this will remain my outlook. Unless somebody really pisses me off.
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